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Oprah 20 Questions Challenge: 9

Multicolor Quran

I want to quote Surah Baqarah here:

وَاتَّقُواْ يَوْمًا تُرْجَعُونَ فِيهِ إِلَى اللّهِ ثُمَّ تُوَفَّى كُلُّ نَفْسٍ مَّا كَسَبَتْ وَهُمْ لاَ يُظْلَمُونَ 2:281

And be conscious of the Day on which you shall be brought back unto God, whereupon every human being shall be repaid in full for what he has earned, and none shall be wronged – 2:281

And

إِنَّا لِلّهِ وَإِنَّـا إِلَيْهِ رَاجِعونَ

Truly, to Allah we belong and truly, to Him we shall return.

I know that the death is written and we will return to whom we belong (according to us Muslims, it’s Allah). We are His creatures and possessions and returning to Him is what we live for (no offense to my non-Muslim readers, this is what I believe in with all my blood, heart, and brain).

The question How do I want to be remembered gave me goosebumps while typing the answer down. Honestly, this question scared me. We do good and bad in this world and we hide the bad from others. We present our good selves to everyone and those who know the bad side of us, we move away from them so that they don’t spread things about us to those whom we relate to. Alas, this is how we are. But how are we supposed to hide it from God? He is EVERYWHERE. He is in my HEART. He knows what I am doing, what I am going to do (good or bad), and what not.

I don’t want to be remembered as a good human being. I don’t want to be remembered as a person who was nice to everyone, made jokes, sometimes hurt people, other times bring smiles, and so on. I don’t even know how I want to be remembered by the way. I know how I DO NOT want to be remembered but I have no freaking idea about how I really want to be remembered. I am scared. I am thinking about the deeds. I am thinking about this world. I am thinking about what’s going to happen to our souls. I am thinking about the heart that sometimes misguide me and I jump into wrong doings. Come on, we all do at some point. There’s nothing to hide. Even one single lie is a wrong doing. My father told me once, “Never lie. Stop lying and you’ll see a whole new and good change in your personality.” Now I get it. When we lie, we hide the things we’ve been into. We hide our real selves. If we are intending to commit a small mistake, we go ahead just because we believe that we can hide it by lying. But when we tell the truth, we don’t even get into the wrong stuff because deep inside our hearts, we know that if tomorrow, we are questioned, we got to tell the truth about it and if we do something wrong, we will be punished. Or at least judged. Bam, all the wrong doings avoided.

Anyways, coming back to the real question, I don’t really know how I want to be remembered. But since this question is a challenge, I’d answer it anyways. I want to be remembered as a person who had Faith alive. Like always. Reason? My friends know what I’ve been through and FAITH was the only thing that kept me sober till date. That’s all.

Next week’s question is a surprise. No, not telling it now 🙂

Ta ta!

-Arsh Azim

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